Journey to Marriage 8 - Traumas and Roller Coasters

Firstly, I'm excited. I entered for the BBN Wonderland competition for 30 lucky brides, and I made it! Yaayyy! It was a writing competition about how your special friend(s) have been influential on your special day. Y'all know I'm a writer na, and I have a special story with a special friend, lol. All I did was just pick the first two editions of this series, and sent them. Of course, the story revolved around the one and only Berry Dakara. And I wonnnnnnnnnn! For that, I get to be treated like a princess. It's going to be my mini vacation before my vacation, cos immediately I get back from the wonderland this Sunday, I leave the country for my last vacation as a single woman that same day, and for that, I'm mega excited.

Back to the series...

The next one month of my life was not funny. That’s all I can say. A and K felt it was a very good sign. They said a guy does not make such a statement to a girl is not seriously considering. In K’s mind, I had already married, I should just go and claim my husband, lol.

Cakes, being the closest to him, said it was very good, and basically echoed what A and K said about his seriousness. All these while, this guy never said anything to Berry and Cakes about the date. Berry was shocked that he could have said such a thing to me, cos he was being mute to them.

As for me, a day later, I became pissed… yes, pissed. My mind had started playing tricks on me.

How dare he say I should go and pray for a month? Yes, I know we were hooked up, but who does he think he is self? Me, I should be praying about a man? He should be the one on his knees, praying, and asking God to give him direction. If he wants, let him come. If he doesn’t want, let him go!


Thing is whenever I like or I'm considering someone, I always pray concerning the issue. I don't need any special period dedicated to praying about many things in life, except in special cases. So definitely, I had been praying concerning this issue from the first day

Two days after this, I was extremely troubled in my spirit. I had a very expository dream, which revealed some things to me, concerning delays in marriage, and how I had gained my victory.

When I woke up, I knew what exactly I had to do. I went to my sister, and talked to her. We decided on a 21 days prayer and fasting concerning this. We did this, not fight demons or enemies, but purely to enforce the victory God had already wrought.

And that was how I started praying and fasting, even though I had earlier wondered about praying about him. Let’s call him BH (Better Half). My prayer was about enforcing victory, asking God to direct me concerning decisions about marriage. I put all sentiments of emotions aside, and was very sincere. I said things like “I like BH, I really do, but take him away if he’s not yours for me.” It was a spiritually intensive period for me, but I knew I had to pay that sacrifice to change the course of my life forever.

Apart from being spiritually intensive, it was also an emotional roller coaster period . First of all, I didn’t know how to start asking questions, without appearing desperate. I didn’t want it to seem I was the one doing all the one-month assignment. We were building friendship, learning about each other, but I felt he wasn’t there yet, where I wanted him to be.

I used to tell D during the fast period, I have sense strongly in my spirit that this guy is my husband o, but anyway let God’s will be done. I told her also that if eventually I decide to marry this guy, the final confirmation from God will be that we would have no single issue with parental approval, concerning tribal differences. That will be the real miracle.

A lot of times, I wanted to cut BH out of my life. I felt I wasn’t getting anywhere with him, and everything was just a waste of my time. Hot today, cold tomorrow, and I was just tired.

About half way through the fast, I said to God sincerely “I like this guy, and I need direction concerning him. He’s still holding back a bit, and unsure. If he’s your will for me, I want him to like me much more than I like him, and it will be evident for all to see. He’s your son, deal with him yourself.”

And that’s exactly what happened. From then on, that he fell head over heels is an understatement. I had done my bit, but this one was completely God.

Two days to the end of the fast, I made a statement of conviction to myself, I was as sure as the back of my hand… I said “I am going to marry this guy.”

But for now, we must wait for the imposed one month to be over to know what direction to go.