My Husband's name is... (Sisterhood of the World Bloggers)



Wow, I can’t remember when last I did a tag. I normally just dodge or hide. But Lola Oseni specifically called me out on this one, so I guess I have nowhere to run to. She nominated me for the Sisterhood of the World Bloggers. And I am really honoured to be nominated. You can check out her blog here

Here are the rules
Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site;
Put the award logo on your blog;
Answer the ten questions sent to you;
Nominate five blogs;
Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer.

Now, let’s see if I will rebel against some of these rules.

Done the first and second. Now to Lola’s ten questions

1. What is your biggest pet peeve?
I have so many, but I think it is indiscipline of any form. I just can’t stand undisciplined and unruly behaviour. Why jump queues or drive ‘smart’? Are the other people fools? Why go to an event or church, and not conduct yourself well? If the policy says don’t chew gum in the sanctuary, does it kill you as a teenager not to chew gum? Why step on the head of others to get ahead? As a civil servant, why keep people’s lives on hold just because they refused to bribe you?

2. What does your last text message say?
“SellerHQ by Konga: You have a new order: Order No:………”
But seriously, do people still send SMS these days? Only businesses do that.

3. Can you taste the difference between Pepsi and coke? Which do you prefer?
None. I don’t take soda, and try to avoid processed sugar as much as possible. Flat stomach is non-negotiable for me. Water is the way.

4. Make a confession about anything.
20 minutes later, I am still thinking of an answer to this question. I’m sorry but I have no confession to make, lol.

5. Name one item on your bucket list
My bucket.

6. If you were another person would you make friends with yourself?
I don’t think so, lol. I’m so different from everyone that it is mind-boggling. It is like the whole world goes south, and I just face north. And I can’t even be bothered, lol.

7. What is your secret weapon to lure the oppoiste sex, boyfriend, husband, potential?
If I reveal it, then it won’t be secret again, lol.

8. What do you want to know about the future?
Simple! My husband’s first name. It will reduce the suspence and work by 99.999%. Lol. The toasting will go like…

Toaster: Atilola, I want to marry you. I think you are the woman of my dreams.

Me: Is your name Iyanuoluwalandurode

Toaster: No.

Me: Sorry, you are not my husband because my husband's name is...

Case closed. No time wasting, or unnecessary prayer of “God, if this guy your will for me…”

9. What would you change about your experience in secondary school?
Kai. This one is hard o. Okay. I remember. I won’t have allowed a wicked senior force me into confessing to a theft I didn’t commit. You can read the whole story here.

10. Scary movies or happy endings?
Happy endings. The real world is already filled with a lot of scary things, and we need happy ending movies for some escape.

I nominate
Mobolaji Amusu
Berry Dakara
Okeoghene
Lifetitudes
Naija Single Girl

So for my questions to you, I want to believe my questions are very interesting, lol.
1. What is your biggest pet peeve?
2. Team Whatsapp or Team BBM?
3. Eat healthy, and watch what goes into your body? OR Life is too short, enjoy all the food while you can? Which of these two describes you best?
4. Make a confession about anything.
5. Do you think ladies with natural hair take the “team natural” thing too far?
6. Can you marry a man exactly like your father?
7. What is your opinion about premarital sex?
8. What supernatural power do you wish you had?
9. Tell us something you wish you hadn’t done in the past
10. Books or Movies?

My first online shopping experience in Nigeria

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For the first time in history, I shopped online in Nigeria. On Friday, I decided to carry out a search on google for an affordable dual sim phone I need to use next weekend while I’m away. The search took me to Jumia’s website. So I thought, rather than have my assistant going to computer village next week to haggle over a suitable phone for me, which was the initial plan, I should as well try buying it here.

You see, I am not new to online shopping at all, seeing that I don’t really like physical shopping, and I am not much of a buyer. I usually get a lot of my stuff from amazon.com and .uk, Dorothy perkins, house of fraser online stores. etc. And when I am in Nigeria, if I really need something, I buy from Ali express. All these must qualify as a need for me to even get them since I am not exactly a spender. But online shopping in Nigeria, I have never done it. And I have never seen the need for it, because again… I hardly buy anything.

Also, I am a seller on Jumia and Konga. I’ve been with Jumia for about 3 years now. Let me say our relationship is like a regular healthy marriage. We fight and make up. We’ve had more good times than bad times, and in the end, our relationship is beneficial to both parties.

I think I was more confident to buy on Jumia because I sell on Jumia anyway, and people buy my products, so why shouldn’t I buy there too? Also, I have my own online store, where we make a lot of our sales. So I have no reason on earth to refuse to eat the food I prepare.

Anyway, I gave it a try, and placed my order. I had chosen the standard delivery because the express delivery meant I would get the next day since I ordered after 1pm. The Saturday delivery was too risky for me because I had to leave home by 12noon for a performance. So even though it was compulsory for me to get the phone in a maximum of 4 days, I chose standard delivery, which was promised for delivery of 2-7 working days, and it was cheaper than express delivery.

Since I was a first time buyer, some lady called me one hour later to confirm my seriousness. I confirmed, and told her I needed the phone asap, and explained why I couldn’t use the express delivery. She told me my ordered item was under a delivery of 1-4 days. Anyway, around 7.30am on Saturday, some guy calls me, and asks if he can deliver to me that day, to which I said as long as he makes it before 12 noon.

Lo and behold, by 9am, I got my phone. I was pleasantly surprised and pleased, that I even purposely paid the delivery guy extra. I mean, I ordered the phone past 6pm on Friday, and I chose standard delivery. So that’s how I’d have wasted extra money on express delivery.

Now, I don’t know whether everyone who buys on Jumia has such a pleasant experience. Maybe I was treated with such love and priority because this is my first time, but the stress was taken off me and my assistant completely. I mean, I went on google to search for a phone, and I ended up with a phone in my hand in 15 hours.

Please note, after placing the order on Jumia, I also went to Konga to see if I could get a better deal, but it was more expensive by 5,000 naira, so I didn’t bother. My products on Jumia and Konga cost the same, so I’m covered in that aspect, though I have more products on Konga than Jumia. You can visit my store on Jumia and Konga by clicking here and here.

Will I shop online in Nigeria again? Well, if it is an urgent need, and I get the best deal online, yes I would. If not, well, sayonara.

What of you? Have you shopped online in Nigeria? What was your experience like? Good, like mine, or terrible?

Disclaimer

I was not asked, paid, or cajoled by Jumia or anyone to do this post. In fact, no one or organisation was aware of my intention to do this post. I am just writing my personal experience. Anything that suggests the contrary is a mere coincidence. Thank you.

The reason for her happiness...

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Wedding Bells ring
Ring placed on her finger
Fingers placed in her husbands 
Husbands kiss on her lips
Lips curved up smiling in happiness 
Happiness not because she met the man of her dreams
Dreams have finally produced a sigh of relief 
Relief that now, all the aunties will finally give her a break

The Robot who dressed in Human Flesh

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All my life, I see people carry themselves and take actions that make it seem like they have no choice.

People do things to please family, friends, foes, everyone but themselves. We are all aware of the radical decisions people make to please others, but that is not what I want to talk about now. I am talking about simple everyday decisions.

Do you know that choice is not a gift or privilege to you? It is your right as a human being, and you should exercise it every day of your life, knowing that every choice you make has its consequences.
As a child, you have the right to obey or disobey your parents. It is your choice, but you must fully understand the consequence of disobeying your parents. So you can choose to obey them because you understand that the consequence of not doing so will spell doom for your future, not because you are a robot devoid of choice.

As an adult, you have a choice to be lazy or hardworking. You have a right to choose how exactly you want your life to play out. You shouldn’t graduate from school and then look for a job just because society expects you to. You should understand that you have the choice to be a lazy bum just occupying a space on earth, and you must understand the consequence of that choice, which is that you will become no one to be reckoned with, and possibly poverty-stricken, suicidal, and depressed.

Why am I taking this angle?

The lack of understanding of choice and consequences is what has driven so many people to frustration today. People live by the guideline that society has set for them. I have to obey my parents because I was groomed to do so. I have to study hard and excel in school because my parents would like it. I must then get a job because that’s the next thing society expects. I would then get married because well… that’s the next thing on the agenda. I have to slave for a promotion at work or strive for my business to expand because my children have to go to good schools. And so it goes on and on and on. After 50 years, we get a successful but frustrated individual perfectly cooked up in the pressure cooker of ‘societal expectations.’

Do you know what? No you don’t! You don’t have to obey your parents. You don’t have to study hard. You don’t have to get a job. You don’t have to get into a relationship or get married. You don’t have to strive for a better pay. In fact, you would be exercising your right as a human being if you do the opposite of all these. You won’t be doing anything wrong

But…

You must understand the role of choice and consequences. Each choice leads to an outcome, and you must choose wisely. So let’s flip the script a little bit.

I choose to obey my parents because disobeying them would cause my future to be doomed (or earn me serious thrashing if you are an African child, lol). I choose to study hard and excel in school because I understand the role it plays in the opportunities presented to me later on. I choose to get a job or start a business because I understand that I have been placed on this earth for a purpose, and I want that purpose fulfilled before I die. I choose to get married because I understand the role of companionship in the life of an individual, I found someone I love and loves me back, and life would be dreary without him/her. I choose to strive for promotion at work or business expansion because I want a better quality of life, and to give my family the opportunity to make well-informed choices like I have done. I choose, I choose, I choose.

After 50 years, we get an individual who knows that no matter how his life turns out, he can rest knowing that he made his own choices. This individual is bound to be more fulfilled, and would makes less mistakes because his life is well thought out.

I pray that in raising children, parents would explain well the principle of choice and consequence rather than take the because-I-said-so approach, which is what most people do. A child who understands choice and consequence to the tee turns out well in life.

And to the fully-formed adults, let us all drop the I-have-to-do-it attitude we approach life with. No you don’t. You don’t have to do it because it is expected of you. You have a choice. You have a choice. You have a choice.

You don’t have to marry that man. You can wait for a better man, even though you would have to wait a little longer. Why marry into misery?

You don’t have to stay in that job. You can resign, and fulfill your purpose on earth, even though you might have to be broke for a little while, and be more financially prudent. Why live a life of frustration?

You don’t have to join every trend you see in real life or social media even though you don’t understand it. You can choose to stand out of the pack, and be counted for something more reasonable. Why lose yourself just because you want to blend in?

You don't have to go to every friend's house to play and gossip. You don't have to buy that extra Aso Ebi, whether you have a similar colour in your closet or not. Trust me, you would save a lot of time and money by doing these two things. People will laugh at you, insult you, and say all sorts, but remember you have a right to choice. Any other thing is you handing that right over to society.

It is your life. It is not your father’s life, friend’s life, sister’s life, or brother’s life. It is your life!

You are not a robot disguised in flesh. You are a human being.

You have a choice! Exercise it.