There’s a dangerous wave of distorted feminism sweeping through social media now, so dangerous that ignoring it will only guarantee its rise.
I was particularly taken aback this past weekend when I came across rants bashing women who were interested in fighting for their marriages, honouring commitments, or even wanting to get married. I really don’t follow trending topics so I wasn’t aware it had gotten bad… women directly attacking marriages and calling for its extinction, unabashedly spewing vulgar words, throwing morality out of the window, and preaching the gospel of indiscriminate sex since you know “we are all adults.” And if you are happily married, you dare not show face on such forums to defend the sacred institution, lest you be torn to pieces.
I do not doubt that there are bad marriages out there, but is the solution to bad marriage “no marriage?” There are bad bosses and jobs out there, how come people are not clamouring for job extinction? There are bad political leaders all over, but no one says we should eliminate civic leadership. There are so many bad things out there, as a result of the perversion of the good, but we don’t see people piking up placards to protest their continuation.
Let’s not be blinded to the new-age attack on family institution. The family is the originating unit that society emanates from. Take down the family structure, you take down society. That is why people who peddle this dangerous mentality say they can get the benefit of marriage, without being married. They want children outside wedlock, they don’t care whether the man is present in the child’s life or not. In fact, they won’t mind a sperm donor, since you know “all men are scum.” They want the pleasure of sex, without the burden of commitment to any man, so if the man begins to misbehave, they can just walk out at any time. These people call themselves feminists, but they have gotten feminism all wrong. Feminism is the theory of equality of the genders, not obliteration of a gender. They want to completely obliterate the role of men and fatherhood. They have forgotten the effect of this menace amongst black Americans.
They portray marriage as a prison that society and religion forced us into, and singleness and divorce as freedom from your shackles, ignoring the fact that there are a lot of good marriages out there, and some people got married out of choice, not out of pressure.
I realize that in all we do, we are always guided by our values and beliefs. I’m a Christian, and unashamed about that. I am quite rebellious, and I do not care for societal expectations and pharisaic laws. I am guided by the living word of God, which is the Bible, and its tenets guide my code of conduct. I don’t know what these people are guided by, but I know that if we all decided to be guided by nothing, flesh will be so strong that we’ll just be trailers without brakes, driving down a slope at a very high speed. It’s just a matter of time before we crash
My heart especially goes out to all the young girls out there who are currently being, and will be deceived by the wave of distorted feminism, young ladies who haven’t even had the opportunity of either being loved or heartbroken, yet their minds are already being manipulated to think that all men are dogs, and marriage is bad. It is then no surprise when these young girls end up attracting the kind of scum they expect all men to be, and they use this to support their narrative. See how they play to the gallery?
And if as a newlywed, your husband makes the mistake of getting home late one night, they tell you to dump his sorry a**, cos that’s exactly what they did. You then begin to wonder if they are really passionate about the plights of those having challenges in marriage, or they just want more people in their camp. These young women are being told that marriage places a limit on you from being a high achiever. They are being told a single story, and never shown the flipside… that there are good marriages out there, that as at 5 years ago, of the 28 women who have served as CEO of Fortune 500 companies, 26 are married, one divorced, one never married. They won’t hear stories like this.
My plea to anyone who reads this is to 1) Always know the truth for yourself, and not be carried away by every opinion on social media, no matter how strong. Many more will come, and they’ll be based on false premises, and people’s faulty perceptions, so get ready. 2) Raise your children to be grounded. That way, when they grow up, and are faced with an avalanche of dangerous agenda, they’ll be so weighted at the bottom such that even if they sway for a moment, they’ll never fall for the propaganda.
P.S: I am aware that there’s a whole lot more to this topic of dangerous feminism, which was left out. I went more in depth about this in my spoken word video, which you can watch here. For this blog post, I just covered the aspect in the context of discussion. I will like to read your opinion about this in the comment section.
Well, to be perfectly honest, you cannot be feminist and be Christian. Just like you can't be feminist and be Muslim or Jewish, even though millions of women claim to adhere to one of these three religions and still be feminist.
ReplyDeleteEven a cursory reading of the Bible, the Quran, and the Torah makes very obvious that all of these religions are heavily anti-women and anti-women's rights.
It's okay to choose your religion over your gender.
It's just important to be honest about it.
There isn't a dangerous wave of feminism sweeping social media.
What is sweeping social media is a much needed wave of hard, honest truths that religious women have long been unwilling or unable to look squarely in the eye.
Truths such as:
Marriage, especially religious-based marriage is indeed a prison designed to cater to all the needs of men in exchange for the illusion of security for women.
And I say illusion because there is millennia after millennia of well documented data that proves beyond the shadow of a doubt that not only do women shoulder 85% - 95% of the burdens of marriage, but that marriage is consistent with numerous negative life outcomes for women and positive life outcomes for men.
These are not opinions. This is the plain truth.
So, in the face of the truth, it is okay to say "Well, I've been raised to believe that what is in the Bible is right regardless of any negative observable outcome of adhering to Bible doctrines, and I believe my religion is ultimately more important than equal rights for women, or any of the things that Feminism fights for."
That's perfectly alright. That's living in truth.
What makes Feminism seem so threatening to religious women is that religious women are honestly rather dishonest.
Most of the women who claim their Christian / Bible-led beliefs matter more to them, still want to enjoy the benefits the feminists who disgust and frighten them secure for them. They still want to be free in the world, they still want to be heard. They still want to be educated. They still want to have some semblance of equality.
What they don't want to do, is acknowledge that their religious beliefs are directly incompatible with any real struggle for women's rights and actualisation.
In short, this post is an attempt to have your cake and eat it too.
I wouldn't worry too much about young women.
Everyone in this world has to choose for themselves what they stand for and what they fight for.
There will always be young women who would rather be married or seen as "good" women even if it means we are all enslaved.
There will always be young women who find that unacceptable, and so, fight.
There will always be young women who will try to pretend you can somehow have the best of both worlds - keeping oppression at bay without strengthening their own position.
If I've learned anything, it's that most people are incredibly short sighted, and act as if what they're hand wringing about has never happened before, when in reality, it has happened many times before.
Every generation thinks the upcoming young generation is on the path to ruin.
I wouldn't worry too much about them.
I'd worry about living honestly.