Taking a break

Hi people. How are you all doing? Hope cool. I have had do  many things on my plate recently, and I need some time to clear them.

I am writing this post to inform you all that I will be taking a break from this blog for a period of 4-8 weeks. By the grace of God, when I get back, I would have achieved all I set to achieve. I will still be reading all your posts via google reader, but I won't be commenting as usual. Toinlicious, this doesn't give you the license to exclude me from the giveaway I entered for, and I might pop in to enter for more giveaways since I like free things, lol.

Just in case you need my editing services, please click here for more details on how to reach me on that.

Sorry for the short post. See you guys soon. Just blink, and I'll be right back.

Warning Alert: There is a bug biting bloggers

Hi People, been too busy and uninspired to do a blog post this week. Trying to clear out my table. All bloggers should start getting scared now. Why? You may ask. Have you guys noticed how the food bug has been biting bloggers lately? 


I followed Eya’s blog as a regular blog. While I was still enjoying her posts, she decided to merge her numerous blogs into one. Next thing, the food aspect seemed to win the battle for her blog attention. Na wa o, Eya, na so you go do us, just tricking us into following a food blog? Lol.

Then came along Myne, with her romance blog. She started doing the food thing too. And I am like you too Myne, what a trickster you are. I am watching and waiting to see if stelzz would toe the same line, cos that’s what her latest post indicates. Some other bloggers I did not mention have been bitten by the food bug too. Suddenly, several regular bloggers are sending food posts to Eya to put up.  9Ja Foodie, where are you o? We are being infected.

One thing is sure, if you post foodie updates on your blog, though I might not comment, trust me, I eat the pictures. I even sometimes believe the pictures are more delicious than the food.

The main objective of this post is to inform you that very surprisingly, I have been bitten by the food bug too. You can find evidences on Eya's blog here and here.

I want to burst some bloggers' bubbles

Hi people. I think I need to be whipped, cos I have been feel like being mischievous recently, which is really unlike me. But for now, I just feel like busting some people's bubbles. All you curious bloggers will thank me for this, cos as some people know, most times, I really cannot be bothered.


1. You know that scripture in the bible which says we cannot hide anything from God? If you don't know, check Hebrews 4:13. That saying applies to your blog posts 100%. What I mean is once you type something in your blog, and hit that publish button, it is over! I repeat, it is over! It can never ever be undone. You can backdate it, update it, reschedule it, but it can never be deleted. This is because there are feeds attached to your blog, so even if you delete the post, it would have fed to who ever has subscribed to your blogs. When I see someone has put up a post, and has deleted it, I just laugh, get more curious, and go to my 'backyard' to read the deleted post. This is the reason why you have to be sure you want to let that thing out before hitting the publish button. I am writing this because I read something a feed from a blogger on my phone today, which I felt was pretty revealing, so I wanted to see the kinds of comment people would drop on her blog, only to see that she had deleted it post. But here it was, sitting on my phone, and also in the feeds of God-knows-how-many-people who are connected to her blog. I know you want to know how to find deleted posts, but be patient, I would get to that.

People, I know you always hear statements like "say whatever you like on your blog, it is your personal space, if people don't like it, they shouldn't come by, etc." I was even guilty of telling Simply Mee that recently. I retract my statement now. Contrary to whatever opinion you might have, your blog is not your diary! If it is something you would ashamed to show your mother, boss, spouse or future spouse, don't publish it on the internet. You shouldn't just write everything and anything, especially if you are not an anonymous blogger. This also reminds me about what Naijalines wrote about Freedom of Speech being a myth. I completely agree with her. Be careful what you put out there, it might come back to bite you in the butt.

I am begging you. Please, please, please. I know you might be young and carefree now, because you might be in your twenties or so, but please, have foresight. Foresight is the ability to envisage the future based on your current actions. All the vulgar words, curses, and all can act against you in future. Even if you are anonymous, some people can still know you. I am one blogger that has met quite a number of bloggers, not only in Nigeria, in person, including anonymous bloggers. I have them on my BB and we are friends, and trust me, I will be meeting more in future, so that anonymous thing is not absolute. Remember, once you hit the publish button, it can never be undone. You can sin against God, and God will forgive you and remember your sins no more, but blogger never forgives, it remembers your sins for life!

So to the people who are interested in sniffing out deleted posts, I will burst the bubble now. It is easy. Just go to your google reader, and that's where all posts, including the deleted ones sit, waiting innocently to soil the owners' names, should there be any need for it.

2. Onto less serious matters. I noticed some people for make the text colour of the number of their followers the same as the number of their background, so people won't know the number of their followers. I also noticed people who do this have very few followers, so I am guessing they don't want people to know this fact. First things first, there is nothing wrong with having few followers, take that from someone who had only four followers for over a year, because I had no idea what blogging really entailed. So if you have few followers and it is bothering you, instead of wasting your time hiding the fact, concentrate on getting followers by being blog friendly, and putting up quality posts.

If you want to follow someone, and you notice you cannot find the number of their followers, don't worry, I am about to burst their bubble. Highlight the area where the number of their followers is supposed to be, like you want to copy the text. Immediately you highlight, you will see the text appear in white, against the background.

Yes, so I have been mischievous again. But seriously, I hope you would look beyond my mischief and be careful about what you put out there, especially if you are not comfortable with people knowing such things about you. Remember, once its done, it can never be undone!

It all started when...

It all started during Christmas season, when my mum brought some hens home. No, it wasn’t the type you killed to celebrate Christmas - she bought these chickens at a giveaway price, off people who rear them to lay eggs, and felt they had made enough money from them.

These chickens did a good job of laying all the eggs we boiled and used in the Ofada rice sauce we served at my mum’s birthday at the end of the year.

After then, they kept laying. The problem is we are a very small family. My mum, in her usual giving manner, then started a new project – Project ‘Feed my friends eight eggs each’. My mum started giving eggs to everyone, and the eggs in the kitchen gradually reduced by the day.

As for me, my diet changed. I started eating one or two eggs almost every day, I even became worried that my mum’s Project eight eggs would shorten my egg ration. Sometimes, I would wake up when the house was empty, go to the kitchen, and find that my mum had emptied the crate of eggs. In my worry, I would then go down to the chicken cage, and find about eleven eggs, and with relief, eat about two of them. From my little knowledge of eggs and cholesterol, I guessed a fully developed adult shouldn’t be doing what I was doing, but I felt I should just indulge. As a child, my siblings and I were never allowed to indulge in anything. Absolutely nothing, wait a minute, the only thing we had in excess was cane and punishment. So this was like a first time for me.

In my house, we always buy our food in bulk, like grains in sacks, and pepper in baskets, but never eggs. So this was the first time I was just seeing eggs idle in the kitchen all the time. I work from home, so I am always the only one at home almost all day, until late in the evening when others start getting back. I was therefore the only one that was subject to the temptation of eating loads of eggs – the eggs stared at no one but me.

So I felt, “Wharraheck, lemme just indulge now, after all, these chickens would stop laying eggs one day, and I would return to my two eggs a week routine.” The problem is my issues did not want to wait for the chickens to stop laying eggs before they started surfacing.

The first thing I noticed was intense migraine. I was and still am not sure whether I can link this directly to the eggs, but I sure could not say my grandmother was the one ‘doing me’ from the village, because she died last year, although she might have buried the jazz under the ground somewhere, and somebody might have chosen that spot to pound yam every day, and the more they pound the yam, the more ferocious the migraine. As there was no way to link this to the eggs, I kept eating them.

One day, I then looked at my laps, and they looked bigger. I was like “wow, I am adding weight again. 2013 is indeed my year of restoration and bigger things. All the hips and weight I lost in 2012 is now being restored to me. God is indeed good.” After thinking this way, I quickly went online to check the link between excess eggs and growing fat – I saw none. So I kept eating the eggs.

The next thing was that I started noticing irregularities in my digestive system, my throat felt like there was a big stick in it, the upper part of my stomach was painful, I stopped feeling hungry even till late in the afternoon. If not for the water therapy I usually do every morning, I am sure this problem would have surfaced earlier than it did. At this point, I knew there was a problem. It sure couldn’t be my grandmother’s jazz, she is dead, for heaven’s sake. And in no way could pounding on the jazz affect my whole digestive system. But I still wasn’t sure, so I kept eating the eggs.

Later that day, things got worse. Whenever I got up from the seat I worked from, I noticed my legs were bigger, and harder. It was later at night that I realised that blood was not circulating in my legs. So all the while I had been deceiving myself that I was adding weight, I was actually swelling. Gosh, adding weight is not the same thing as being inflated like a balloon. The last time I had a problem with blood circulation in my legs was when I had an accident three years ago, and my legs were affected. I was also on medication. So I wonder what foreign object was in my body to make it swell. As of this moment, I was finding it hard to eat one meal a day.

So what in the hell could have gone wrong that would affect my blood circulation, digestive system, and give me migraine going into two weeks? Maybe it is the devil because he knew I was to be featured as an author and a Spoken Word artist at a literary event in Ibadan, and that event could be a big break for me. He’s such a destiny-destroyer.

“No @ilola, it’s not the devil. It’s one thing and one thing only – your greed! The fact that you see something doesn’t mean you must have it all the time.”

So the next morning, I go to the kitchen, eye  the eggs, which by now is increasing massively in numbers, as my mum’s Project eight eggs is over, yet the chickens won’t stop laying eggs, and then I walk away. The upper part of my stomach is so tight and painful that I can no longer do my water therapy.

My literary program is the next day, yet I can hardly walk well without flinching in pain. I cannot stand straight. My head is pounding. My stomach is tight, I can’t eat because I cannot even get hungry. After some medical advice on the internet, I have therefore changed my diet from indomie and egg or bread and egg to oats with banana and groundnut, orange and pawpaw. Damn cholesterol, damn eggs, I have overdosed on you long enough. Because of you, I can’t even enjoy food this year, and it’s just January.

I just look at these eggs. If only I had orders to deliver hair Deep conditioning mix I sell as one of my hair products, at least, the eggs would serve a purpose for me and other ladies out there. As for now, they are just useless.

At this moment, I am still in pain, due to my over-indulgence, and I don’t even have the luxury of blaming my grandmother or the devil.

You see, don’t blame me or my greed, blame the chickens because it all started when my mum brought them to this house.